hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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