dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
We have started to decorate penises.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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