I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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