jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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