Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
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Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
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I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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