whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
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