I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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