She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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