At least make sure they are 18
Why
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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