id be glad to
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
