My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
