My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Randomize
