i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
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