ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
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In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
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Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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