I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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