At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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