Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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