careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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