we have officially lost it.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
