ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
