Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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