someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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