My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
