everyone is single if you try hard enough
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
