Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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