We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I just saw a hot homeless man
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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