hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
