Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
