how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
