this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Randomize
