Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
