We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
