Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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