He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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