Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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