is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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