I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize