Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize