I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
