Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
