My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
