My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
