I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
