the new term for farting is butt boxing.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
