omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
