the day after is always just damage control
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize