That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Still dying that you shit outside
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Randomize
