Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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