No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
