I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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